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The thing about anger is that it uses up a lot of energy and space in your separated man’s brain and heart.That’s energy and space that he can’t and won’t channel into you in positive ways. He doesn’t consistently spend time with his children.If he was the victim: Depressed, angry, and mistrustful.If your separated man was cheated on by his wife, these fallout emotions will likely rear their heads in some form as you get to know him.If you chose to proceed in dating him, I caution you to proceed slowly and with eyes wide open. Comments like, “Bah, I just want it over,” or “Doesn’t matter, we’ve been strangers for years,” may seem casual, even confident — but they also mask what’s going on underneath and behind the scenes.When a man has truly processed his divorce and moved on, he should be able to speak to it with compassion, kindness, and wisdom.

The bottom line is that going through a divorce requires a lot of him – he must grieve, heal, hash through legalities, potentially adjust to single parenting and financial limitations, as well as rediscover a new sense of who he is today.

Whatever the case may be, these kinds of circumstances are extremely stressful for him, which will inevitably ripple into your relationship together in some way(s).

Another reason he doesn’t regularly see his kids could be because right now, he despises his ex, himself and the divorce situation, more than he loves his kids.

Child support payments are based on the cold hard numbers reported by both spouses in their tax returns. Like it or not, he has financial responsibilities in taking care of his kids, period.

I would be gravely concerned about a man’s character if he did not want to fulfill those commitments. Whether he was the perpetrator of infidelity or the victim, the tailwinds of cheating bring an ugly stench to the divorce process.




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