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Even those who make it through the junior-high and senior-high years with their sexual purity intact will often emerge with damaged emotions, bitterness, and cynicism.To be sure, much of the damage may have been inflicted by the individuals involved, but likewise the system itself is faulty.To them, life is a series of one-girlfriend (or boyfriend)-after-another, which really amounts to one-heartache-after-another.A two-year relationship seems like a long-term commitment.After all, singleness brings opportunities in life that may never come around again.When the possibility of romance does enter one’s life, what a blessing it would be to have developed a lifestyle of purity.“Like a fruit picked green or a flower plucked before it blossoms, our attempts to rush God’s timing can spoil the beauty of His plan for our lives.”Man’s view of love contains several notions that are contrary to God’s, and should therefore be contrary to the way we pursue love, especially love in the deepest and most intimate of human relationships.We must reject the philosophy of love that holds comfort of self as its chief end, reduces love to a mere feeling, and believes that love is beyond control. The substance of romance-as-it-ought-to-be must include, among other qualities, patience, purity, and grace.

The seven habits of highly defective dating I Kissed Dating Goodbye is not just about sexual purity; it scrutinizes the whole course of friendship, courtship, romance, engagement, and marriage.

Smart love begins with the desire for God’s best, and, by default, requires a knowledge of and a willingness to obey God’s rules.

Smart love is revolutionary; its object is God and others, never self.

Harris describes it against the backdrop of his own form practice of (what else?

) “dumb love”: “I was primarily interested in what I could get, such as the popularity a girlfriend could give me or the comfort and pleasure I could gain physically or emotionally from a relationship….




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